Tag Archives: Love

02Feb/16

Dear Bride In A Bit #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear Bride In A Bit,

I’m supposed to be a good writer but the words seem to fail me today. But if this is supposed to be a letter of the heart, then hear my heart’s message to you.

Girls are like beans in a pod they say
Pick one and throw away the others
Do that and you are safe from distraction
Yet this is untrue for me
For when I look, all I see is you
One bean in the pod

Yes, you are attractive
Yes, your smile is magnetic
But I saw beyond this
Because even when you were gone
When all I had were memories
Still you stood out
Alone
One bean in the pod.

Yes I will go places
Yes I will meet people
Exotic European women
Sensual women of the Caribbean
And even dark skinned beauties of Africa
Still my heart beats for one
My mind thinks of one
My eyes see only one
You
My one bean in the pod.

I’ve heard about loving so hard it hurts, well l love you so much it hurts! I need my mind in the right shape for other things right now but you are my beautiful, very pleasant ever present distraction. This morning isn’t one of my better writing days, so l’ll stop here.
See you in a bit.

01Feb/16

Dear George #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear George,

So, I had this big plan for Valentine’s Day. I am not particularly sure if it was for last year or this one but one thing I was certain of was that I wanted you in it. But, before I forget my manners, which is almost typical of me these days, how are you doing? (I am sure you are fine; and this is as literally as it comes.)
Back to my plan, I was going to ‘break the ice’ because this thing they say about the unsaid words being the ones that hurt is true. I have had to live with the words echoing in my head seeking for an avenue to be heard. Just wanting to say – I loved you.
Was I wrong not to have said it earlier? Or maybe it was for the best. I knew the signs…I was sure they meant something. Eye contacts. Brushing of palms against each other. Bumping into each other. Accidental locking of heads (those ones did hurt). Long talks. Long walks. You’d tell me about your fears and frustrations and I’d always be there to tell you that it would be fine. I would always be there to make it fine. I saw beneath the perfect guy everyone knew. I saw the vulnerable one…the one afraid of being hurt…the one who’d let me see it all. I knew I completed you. This sure had to count for something…yeah?
Then the long silence came. You’d shut me out with no reason leaving me with questions that would never get answered. I’d probe myself to figure out what I might have done wrong and I always arrived at the same answer…nothing. I loved you so much that the silence and spaces between us became toxic for me.
Days went by and I slowly started to find some strength. I crawled back into my hole and tried to heal…just when I was about to shut the door, you’d poke your head half-in with a smile so warm that it’d sweep my fears and pain away and I’d forget that your silence once made my heart bleed. I was not surprised with your return because you always returned when I was at my lowest. Did you love seeing me broken?
But then, it’s you George…so I knew I’d always need that hole again for the next silence because it felt okay to hurt for you.
So I wondered why you preferred to have your walls and heart guarded while I let mine down. Darling, I could have built walls too.
I wondered why I was the one who felt vulnerable even though you were the one who told your fears.
I wondered why you’d push me away so much that hurting was no longer a solution for me. I had to run away for my own sanity.
Maybe you could have said something and not let us grow apart…
But then, we ran out of words and then I ran out of love and then we ran out of us…
We lost ourselves and I lost my strength…and I lost the will to keep holding on so tight to nothing.
So we became strangers once again and all I was left with were the ‘what ifs’…
What if we were not so proud and exploited the spaces between us into a love so pure that we only could understand?
What if you didn’t act as though you were the only one who could make decisions for us?
What if you didn’t make it hard for me to love you?
What if I never bottled my anger and pains in fear of losing you forever?
What if we were not a tale of bitter-sweet symphonies?
What if you had shown me that you loved me too?
I could not continue with the ‘what ifs’ because there are no justification for loosing yourself in the process of saving another. So I learnt not to hurt again because there is no reason why anyone should choose this kind of love. I bore my scars and fought to mend my broken soul. My walls came back up. My heart fully guarded once again.
Never again would I let me down.
George, a lot has changed since I last saw you and I have come to realise that I was in love with my idea of you. I’m sorry I expected too much from you.
Anyway, I am proud of the woman I am becoming…and no, I won’t be waiting for you.

Not yours,
Tomi Adesina

17Dec/15

7 Things I’d Consider Before Asking Seyi Shay To Marry Me

Before we get started, I have to make two things clear.

  1. This article is not really about Seyi Shay.
  2. In spite of what you may believe, I have a shot with Seyi Shay.

Now we have those clear, let’s move on.

Seyi Shay like most superstars of her caliber are considered the most eligible bachelorettes any guy could have. This may be right for a lot of guys but maybe not every guy. Maybe not Lord Josh. It’s not a slam dunk, I’ll still have to consider a lot.

Here are 7 things I’d consider before giving Seyi the ring.

Continue reading

09Dec/15

To hear him say I LOVE YOU

“Mom, you can’t just leave! The party is for you and Dad.”

I ignored Deola and headed for my car.

“Mommy, come on.” Tunde joined Deola. “You guys have been married for thirty six years, can’t you just let this slide?”

I kept my eyes on the road. Even if I wanted to stop, I couldn’t now. I did not want them to see the tears in my eyes. My children always thought their mother was tough. I was not ready to blow that cover after thirty five years.

“Mommy, how about Debola and Dunsin? What do I tell them happened to their grandma?” Tunde said and I stopped.

I loved my children but I adored my grandchildren. I considered wiping my tears and going back to the party. I shook my head, it wasn’t worth it. I resumed my march to the car.

“Glory.” I heard his voice call my name. “I love you.”

I wanted to go on but I couldn’t. I stopped and began to sob. Aloud.

***

EARLIER THAT DAY

I love parties. At least I used to love them. My husband and I attended a lot of parties in our day, it seemed like ‘our day’ was long gone now. But it was Christmas and my children – Tunde and Deola had planned a special party was us. My old party instincts kicked in and I was up early to get some things ready.

“Where are you going so early?” My husband stirred on the bed.

“The party is today. Remember?”

“What party?”

“Our Christmas party, the one our children are throwing us.”

“That was today?”

I did not respond. I left the room and very soon was lost in preparations. A few hours later, the kids arrived.

“Where is Dad?” Deola asked.

“I’m not sure. Have you checked the room?”

“No, I’ll just see him later. I can’t believe you have been married for thirty six years.” She said.

“You better believe it.”

“Thirty six years is a long time.”

“Well, when you are committed to somebody, it doesn’t matter how long it is, you’ll stay.”

“The power of love.”

“Love? That’s minor. It’s the commitment that counts. The things you people call love – dates, flowers, all that rubbish is not what matters. Your father has not taken me out since our first wedding anniversary but still I’m here.”

“What! Really?”

“Yeah, that stuff doesn’t matter.” I said. Was I being truthful?

We continued our work in silence. A few minutes later my husband walked into the kitchen looking cross.

“What’s the problem?” I asked.

“Do you know what time it is?”

“No, what time is it?”

“I’ve been waiting for my breakfast for hours. Are you planning to starve me?”

“Come on Dad.” Deola said. “We have been busy. The party starts in a few hours.”

“Maybe he has forgotten about the party already.” I said and went back to my work.

Deola ushered him out of the kitchen and promised him food in five minutes. He was so selfish. He did not even care that I was doing a lot of work, all he wanted was his food. A strange longing coursed through me. Maybe I wanted more than commitment.

***

A FEW MINUTES TO THE PARTY.

“We have sewed this agbada for weeks, why are you doing like this?” I looked at my husband, ashamed of the terrible thoughts going through my mind.

“Look Glory, you know that I don’t wear anko. All the years of our marriage we never wore the same material, why will we start now?” He said.

“I didn’t pick the clothes, the children did. Won’t you just do this to make the children happy?”

“The children…anytime you want to get your way, you always invoke the children.”

“Why won’t I invoke the children when you seem to care about them more than you do me?”

He paused. “That’s not true. Why will I still be married to you if I don’t care about you?”

I wanted opened my mouth to reply him but I changed my mind. I spread the agbada on the bed.

“That’s it on the bed but if you insist you won’t wear it, the blue one is in the wardrobe.” I said and walked out of the room.

The party was already starting outside. Deola saw me and came over.

“We are waiting for you and Dad.” She said.

“We will be with you soon.”

She was about walking away when I saw her ring finger.

“You changed your ring?” I asked.

She smiled and said. “Yeah I did. Bayo bought me another one. Did a lot of drama when giving it to me, it was beautiful.”

“I’m sure it was. When did this happen?”

“Our seventh anniversary.”

I sighed and looked away.

“Are you okay mom?” Deola asked.

“Yes, I am. I’ll go get your father. Tell Tunde and his wife, we will be with you soon.”

She nodded and walked away but I stayed where I was. I tried to empty my mind of all the negative thoughts that were flowing through it. I had to be happy today, at least for the children. I heard a sound behind me and turned around to see my husband. He wore the blue agbada.

“I can’t believe you did not wear the clothe they made for us.” I said.

“We have talked about this already. Let’s just go for the party.” He said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Why? You are the one who has been talking about this party all day. Why are you asking why we are going?”

“I know why I’m going, why are you going?”

He looked at me confused.

“This party is celebrating us a couple. Are we a couple?” I asked.

“Glory, please don’t do this. The children are waiting.”

“The children? That’s what this is about for you? The children?”

“We have been married for over three decades, of course it’s not just about the children.”

“What is it then? You love me?”

He laughed. “We are already knocking on the doors of seventy. Is it now we will be doing lovey lovey?

I shook my head and stormed into the bedroom. I removed my gele and dropped my bag. I picked my purse and the car keys and left the room.

“What happened to your head tie?” My husband said when he saw me. “Where are you going?”

“What do you care? You children are there, go and have your party with them.”

“This party is about us. If you’re not there, we can’t have the party.”

I stopped and faced him.

“Remember how I asked you to let us renew our vows after our tenth anniversary? Hold a little ceremony?”

“Yes. I did not agree and see, twenty six years later and we are still together.”

“Deola showed me her new ring today, she got it for their seventh anniversary.”

“You think her husband loves her more than I love you because he got her a ring?”

“You don’t get it, do you?”

I turned away from him and walked out.

***

BACK TO THE PRESENT

“Mommy, how about Debola and Dunsin? What do I tell them happened to their grandma?” Tunde said

I continued my march to the car.

“Glory.” I heard his voice call my name. “Please don’t go, I love you.”

I wanted to go on but I couldn’t. I stopped and began to sob. Aloud. My husband had not told me he loved me in thirty years.

He walked to me and held me.

“I’m sorry Glory.”

I leaned unto his shoulder, it was a great feeling to be held again. I did not know how much I missed it.

“I love you, as much as I did thirty six years ago.”

“And it took you all these years say so?”

“I thought you knew.”

“I knew but I wanted to hear it from you.”

“How about we use this Christmas party to renew our vows?”

I smiled. “Does it mean, I’ll get a new ring too?”

“Well yeah, you’ll have one before the end of the day.”

“Does it also mean we will wear our anko?”

He laughed. “Yeah.”

“Are you serious?”

“No. I really don’t like that stuff.”

“I guess, I can compromise on that.”

“I love you, a lot.”

“I love you a lot too.”

I didn’t care for much for the ceremony or the ring – I was a grandmother for crying out loud. I was just glad to hear my husband tell me he loves me again. It was the best Christmas gift I could ever get.

02Dec/15

THE THUNDERBOLT

As you can tell from the featured image, I wanted to write this for the #30DaysOfNovember series but I got too many articles, I couldn’t feature all of mine. So here is the one you missed.

THE THUNDERBOLT…

Michael was on one of his customary strolls through the mountainous fields of the little Italian town. He wandered casually through the open field, his two armed bodyguards walking a few steps behind him. He was a fugitive. Far away from his family, his life and a woman he once thought he would spend his life with. Breaking the law had consequences and he was living them. But he was about to experience something wonderful. Continue reading

12Jan/15

BEFORE THE DARKNESS : CHAPTER ONE

image

The fiery hot wind blew against him but he did not seem to notice. His mind was taken up by what he saw; the reflection of his face in the water made him shiver. He slapped his hand across the river and his reflection disappeared in the ripples. He stood and slid across his face the veil that had been his covering for so many decades. Decades that had turned into centuries and centuries into millennia.
The world knew him as Ibilis, the cause of all the evil in the world, and they were right. But they knew so little about him, as little as he wanted them to know. His world was one of darkness, one he hated so much. He had crossed from light to darkness when he had challenged Edumare, a battle he would have won if he had been given a fair chance. His loss meant he had to leave for the abyss called Hades along with a few of his defeated loyal servants. Continue reading