Category Archives: Letters Of The Heart 2016


Not So Dear Ex #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear Ex

You broke my back the first time

Onlookers thought me a fool

They wondered why I laid still

While you whipped me hard

But I laughed at them

“You fools”, said I mockingly

“You don’t know him as much as I do

His whips are no more than cords of love

You think he whips me so I’ll be in pain?

Ignorant fellows! You are so wrong!

He whips me so I’ll cry out for more…

More of him! More of him!

Besides do you not have any other business than to pry in the affairs of a little girl in love?

But they looked on with pity

I never knew why


And soon it happened!

“Ah! He has broken her back!” they cried

I was stunned

I never knew you could go this far

My spine is gone

I’m now bent over and broken.

But you immediately told me not to worry

“It’s just the back; you still have your heart,

And that” You said “is the most important part”

I sincerely was in doubt

But with much dearly words, you bought me over

I thought “I can live with a broken back, a heart and you”

Then I heard you say “Give me your heart”

“Had I misheard?!”

“You are asking for my heart?”

“Why would I give you that?”

“Why should I even trust you again?”

And you replied, with the most reasonable words I had ever heard

“Because no one will take you with a broken back anyways

You sure cannot walk

You sure cannot cook

You sure cannot reproduce

What else will be your use?

I would take you just as you are”


“OH MY GOD!” I exclaimed

“You are most generous of all

Wisest of all boys!

I’ll crawl at your feet

I’ll kneel to you

I’ll bow in total submission”

Quietly, you said

“You’ve got no choice, you’re bent already”

But I chose to hear “you’re best already”

And I handed my heart over

With such delightfulness

With such glee

A grateful heart

Awe filled eyes

I sang, “Amazing love

How sweet the sound

Shown to a Wretch like me

I’m blessed”, I blushed

Onlookers glared, I cursed


Then you started on my heart

Oh! How I loved your touch

My heart started faster

How it longed for your touch


Then you moved on to a massage

I protested:

“I don’t need one, go on with the former”

But you shushed me

Said I needed to relax

I kept shut but silently thought

“This massage is much painful than the caress”


You then graduated to a throb

“You’re starting to beat at my heart!”

I cry for you to stop

But you are nowhere to be found

In your place stands a monster

With a horn at his waist

I cried, I pleaded

You laughed, you raped me

Then took my heart and crushed it

You walked away

 You left me, with a broken back, a crushed heart, a dying soul.


It’s been six years already

I’m sorry to have bothered you with the flashback

I only want to say “Thank You”

Thank You for making me tougher

For making me meaner

And do have it at the back of your mind

That you are being cursed

Not by me! No, not by me!

But by the boys who have come after you

They plead and plead

That I give them a chance

Into this crushed heart.

But I tell them that my ex said no one will take a bent back, a crushed heart, a dying soul.

So make sure you never forget:

You are forever remembered.


Dear Alex #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear Alex,
I am not one to gloat – especially over something I’m partly responsible for but I have to say; I told you so.
I warned you.
“This will not end well”, I said on the bus taking us to your house after our first date; I said it holding your hand and looking in your eyes – those sea-surface eyes that go from clear to stormy in moments. I said it again at the beach – just before you kissed me the first time; turning away so that your purple-lipstuck lips smeared my right cheek instead of my mouth.
Remember that first kiss?
I have to admit; that was my undoing. Till this day I query myself why I allowed you kiss me that day. I don’t know; maybe I finally decided to accept that I’ve been a wandering ship looking for a port to berth for too long. Maybe I was tired of being so strong over nothing.
Maybe I was just being a man.
Whatever the excuse, I sha kissed you back and that was it. Whatever my intent, leaning away from your lips and seeing the light in your eyes took away my resolve. I couldn’t tell you the kiss meant nothing; not after seeing you smile like I hadn’t seen you do – not in the two months I’d known you.
So I swallowed whatever reservations I had and played along.
I know too; your account of this sequence of events will be way different from mine. I puzzled over that for a while; I mean I wondered why a guy and a girl will tell two different accounts of the same breakup. After a while though it came to me; I understand now that women tend to remember it the most convenient way,
And that’s fine, but I would really be upset if you do not recount my reluctance to engage you in a romantic joust. I recall clearly how many times I mentioned some permutation of ‘this will not end well’ to you; to the point I started to sound like a broken record even to myself. So I kept quiet and went with it – and at some point I started to believe this time would be different. I started to think I had found my last bus stop; somewhere I could finally park my wahala.
Ah. So much for wishful thinking.
You did say I think too much.
But I had to let you go, Alex. Can you at least see that?
Can you understand that I didn’t and still do not require saving; most of all not by a soulful innocent such as you? I am comfortable with the man I am; I just hate that innocent bystanders such as yourself get caught up in my bullshit.
But I tried to save you from me. I tried.
The question I know will bother you for a while is; did things go the way they did because they were meant to, or did they go the way they did because I sat on my fat ass and did nothing?
You know, it bothered me for a bit too. Destiny and all that ‘meant to be’ crap. I’m tempted to say we weren’t meant to be – but selfish pride won’t allow me lie, not even to spare your dignity. You know for a truth that I do not believe in destiny; I believe it is whatever we make of it. So yes; maybe we ended the way we did because I refused to try – but I told you. I warned you.
You see, I know who I am.
What’s the point of this? Well, it came to my attention that you hate me very much because I refused to explain things to you. I didn’t give you closure, I just walked away.
Would you want me to stand in front of you and tell it to your face that a scorpion in Lagos cannot be a crab in Bayelsa? Why you women kid yourselves and think you’re the missing mysterious ingredient in some guy’s life is beyond me. I hope you’ve learnt now – some guys are just born to be assholes.
Honestly however, I do not believe you’re angry. I don’t even think you’re aware that I exist. I saw your wedding pictures last week, and a happier bride I’m yet to see. So – maybe this is closure more for me than you; which is why you’ll never get to read this.
I need to let go too, you know.
I need to let go of you; let go of the knowledge that, once again I had the world in my hands and, instead of clearing the clutter so I could hold it properly I let it go so I could hold on to –
Hold on to nothing.
I need to accept that I once had everything that mattered; every form of happy available to man was mine for the taking.
I hadn’t even had to ask for it.
So I put these in words, close them away somewhere and open another bottle of Orijin and think of a time –
A time when I was loved.

7th of February 2016
4:12 am


Dear Thousand Miles Away #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear Thousand Miles Away,

I close my eyes and wish the desire I have in my heart is not left in the arms of fate. But the distance took away all my dreams and fantasies only to replace them with a longing to bring reality to the aching feelings of my heart. I wish we had more time to explore those first few days of realization. I remember how I reached out to stand by your side in our first picture, maybe I knew the time was short and wanted a lot more. But it was a story we never started.

Waiting has never felt so sweet and yet so sour. It brings hope to my heart but tears to my eyes. It gives expectations to my heart but fills my days with fear. A double feeling of Hope and Doubt. I can only ride on the wings of imagination of a story we can make together.

Burning with jealousy of the memories you create without me. Though I have made my own memories several times, opening pages and chapters, the story just always flip to an end.  Maybe it was just never right or it was never meant to be without you. I still don’t have a clue what my love journey would be like. I long to find out but I’d rather do it with you. Yet you are so far away. I’ll hang on to hope, believing I will see your face so close again. I am not sure if Love actually happens twice in a Lifetime. Still you are too true and I am almost certain this will not happen again in this life. So I’ll find Joy in waiting and hoping that I make my story with only you.

There are times I fear the distance is all we have to share. I continue to look forward to when the 5,270 Miles will be a few steps away; when my morning hours will no longer be your night hour.  I can only believe that we won’t be grey when the time finally arrives. And pray the little string left of our hope will not wear off.  Though you seem far by miles, I’m on the other side of the moon, just a step over the ocean.
Dreaming Alone, Waiting Alone.


Dear Tosin #LettersOfTheHeart

A few weeks ago, ‘’Hey Soul Sister’’ by Train was playing on the radio. The song took me back down memory lane to a period in my life I haven’t given any consideration to in the last two years.
It was second semester in our third year in the university, we were seated next to each other in a Financial Accounting class. Our seats were located in the middle of the class and considering our lecture’s bedroom voice it wasn’t the best choice.
I didn’t want to be the one that lost out on our current deal, so I was faking concentration, refusing to acknowledge that you were stealing long glances at me whenever you took a break from writing your note.
I wanted so bad to wrap my free hand in yours and let you trace circles on the inside of my palm but that would mean losing our deal and my pride was larger than my need for touching hands.
My fake concentration broke when you reached for your ear phones and placed them in my ears and the first line of the Train song blasted into my head ‘’Lip stick stain on theonont lope of my left side brain’’.
Hey we all know that nerd Ore would know the part of the brain responsible for love.
I broke into a smile and in that moment I am sure I loved you.
I know this is weird and I am the last person you are expecting a letter from, but don’t drop it just yet.
There is a point to this and it isn’t to win you back or drag up old emotions; listening to that song left me feeling guilty and there are a few things I like you to know so here goes.
It feels like I am writing to a stranger and this simple fact has me wondering if you still love milk or if you still take the most beautiful unassuming photographs of people but who am I kidding I know deep down that you would always love milk and photography makes up more than 50% of how you express yourself and share your beauty with the world.
What I really should be wondering about is what goes on in your day, how many new movies you have seen, which series you have gotten hooked on and what new artist is bringing your ear drums to life. I have lost the right to know these things, to have long conversations about nothing important, just the shared joy of  listening to the next person’s voice.
I am sure you have a tonne of questions for me after these two paragraphs but I am getting to the point of this letter and here goes. Sorry I didn’t accept your hand of friendship after our ‘’relationship’’ ended. Fun fact it took me so long to accept it and learn to say it out loud.
I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be friends with you to share any aspect of my life with you, I needed to grow without you, find out who I am and the possibilities available to me without you.
All of who I was at that point in my life was wrapped up tightly in you; I had lost my identity in you, my dreams each and every one had you in it. You had become my sun and I was willingly drawing light and direction from you.
I had to find myself, learn to dream for me and learn to love myself without you. Any relationship with you would have hindered the journey to self-discovery I needed to embark on. There was never a perfect time to explain any of this to you, heck I didn’t understand what was going on at the time.
I needed to be selfish to heal and I hope you can understand that.
I have moved on with my life; learnt to deal with life situations more maturely and more importantly learn to face life as a complete individual.  So I am just wondering how you are, how your dreams are panning out, and I have tried to turn off my wondering mind in your direction but I have come to the understanding that there is always a room that ‘’firsts’’ occupy though, it’s an ever shrinking space.
So feel free to reply ‘’Stranger Ore’s letter’’ or not, the ball is entirely in your court. Consider this an explanation, a peace offering of some sort and you are officially off the hook from the promises of the song ‘’The Only Exception’’.
From A Distant Part of Your Past

Dear Natalie #LettersOfTheHeart

( a letter from the past, to be read by my ‘Cupcake’ on the 15th of February, 2016)

Dear Natalie,
Forgive me but I might get my tenses wrong since I’m writing in the present as though the future me is talking about the past that is still future to this present, and am expecting you to relate to this from the future to both yesterdays past and my current present which is an even further past from when you should be reading this.
Correct tense or not, my love for you will be eternal, ( except you force me to eat Amala, yes you know I hate Amala that much, in sickness and in health, but not with Amala, No no no NO)

If you’re reading this on the 15th you’ll know I proposed yesterday, valentines day. I’ve tried to imagine a future without you, it would be quite dreadful for me, so I hope you said YES.

Since the beginning of 2015, (yes, 2015) I’d been researching engagement rings, ( yes! I’ve been ready to put a ring on it for a loooong time ). At first I felt like there were so many options to choose from; style, what metal, gem type, cut. Totally spoilt for choice, it was like there were as many rings as there were women. Then it hit me, out of all the women in this world, I fell madly in love with you, Natalie, it amazes me just how happy I am to be with you, to have you, to share my heart and my world with you. I couldn’t just pick a ring, I had to find the right one.

Now I believe I’ve picked an engagement ring that captures my deepest feelings for you. It’s a handmade silver Celtic Claddagh ring with an emerald gemstone; just like you it’s uniquely crafted, silver so it will  match your skin flawlessly, the claddagh ring design symbolises the core of our relationship; our crazy Friendship, how beautifully we love each other, and our steadfast Loyalty to each other through stormy weather, plus the emerald gemstone is in your favourite colour, no boring white for you babe.

Right now I’m writing from Minna, Nigeria, and you’re all the way up north in Bristol, UK, I know you were expecting me on the 18th of February, but I fibbed, I’m planning to sneak over to Bristol, prank our friends, surprise you and propose on Valentines day. I know both of us are not great fans of relationship clichés, but I felt this had to be an exception. We’ve been friends since 2012 and courting since 2013, but this will be the first valentines day when we’d actually be together.

The long distance hasn’t been easy for us, my whole being constantly aches to be with you, every day without you I’m like a husk, simply moving, longing and waiting. But somehow, against crazy odds, we’ve made it work through your resilient and patient effort. I owe you big time, for this I pray that God will reward you ( or us) with 8 children; 4 Troublesome boys and 4 Beautiful girls. May you not resist the Lords Blessing! ACCEPT IT In Jesus Name!

Babe, I’ve missed so much about you.
I’ve missed seeing you shake your head at my stupid jokes, how you roll your eyes at my ridiculous behaviour, the blush in your cheeks when I tease you pointlessly.
I’ve missed the warmth that fills my heart everytime you smile lovingly at me, hearing you laugh with me, how you dote over me. I’ve missed watching you sing. I’ve missed holding your hand while we pray together.

I could write all day about what I miss about you, but unfortunately we’ve got a few ‘eavesdroppers’ on this letter, and they have lives to get back to, cars to drive, and road traffic to dodge.

I want to spend the rest of my days with you, be a loving husband to you, raise and nurture 8 wonderful children with you, create and share new experiences, invent family traditions, have an awesome life with you.

Yes of course we have our differences, but we’ve recognized, understood and each compromised for them. We’ve got shared dreams and desires for the future, we support, complement and have faith in each other. We should tackle the world together.
Ever since I knew the depths of your heart I had to ask this question; every moment, every step, every breath has been leading inevitably, irreversibly and unquestionably, towards this one question. You still have a choice to make, but I have no choice, it has to be you. But I must ask, I must hope and I must pray. So..
(Deep breath)

Natalie Ajani, will you be my wife?


PS. She said “YES”! Be nice, drop a “Congratulations” in the comment section.



Dear Amanda #LettersOfTheHeart

Some people are beautiful, not in looks, not in what they say, just in what they are.

Dear Amanda,

It’s been a while I wrote you a letter, not since you made me write you letters in Yoruba. The effort put into those words is enough for a 100 letters and that’s probably why you’re just now receiving another letter from me.

I had long learned to write down words my heart really wanted to say which my lips couldn’t utter and today I share those words with you. Some of the words are in pictures and even though they are not words I wrote, I have kept them (some for over 5 years) because they expressed what was in my heart aptly at the times I saw them. They gave voice to my very deep thoughts and emotions.

Once upon a cold December morning, I saw you for maybe the 100th time; a graceful young lady who until that moment was just another girl I saw around. But that morning, something was different. You were like a diamond, glittering and catching my attention everywhere I turned. I got hooked forever. Or not.


Your beauty was simple yet ravishing, your carriage relaxed yet confident and your character gentle yet captivating. You became the dream, the mission was clear.



In retrospect, the lines below should have been my first line to you. You know I have wished severally that I could meet you for the first time all over again so I can say these words to you;







Anyone who’s ever fallen in love would know that expressions are really hard when you’re truly in love but I tried to express myself every way I could, sometimes the expressions were successful, at other times, they were woeful.


It was like we were in a maze; seeking to love and seeking to be loved but unable to meet those needs. I couldn’t understand why. Loving could be so simply complicated



I loved that you were different but I tried in vain to fully understand the thought pattern of women






This is the best way I could describe it. It was like I fell in love with a beautiful flower in full bloom with petals soft and tall like the Iroko tree, smelling like vanilla chocolate but was not really chocolate because it was made of flour and it wasn’t actually a flower.

Yeah, I was that confused.

The many little pretty things you did had taken up all of my heart. You say I taught you to give but I don’t know how true that is ’cause I know you are a black belt in giving. When life puts several hundred miles between us, I like that you were always ready to give me several hours of your days on end in phone conversations; that’s one of the little things that filled up my heart.


Like music stopping in the middle of a dance, the fire burned out. They say we forgot to stoke the fire. I asked how we were supposed to stoke the fire of love and there were a hundred responses but no answer.


We had to find our own answers. It took a while but we found our answer, and yeah baby, I chose you yesterday, I choose you today and I will choose you for the next thousand, thousand tomorrows.



We found our rhythym, you began to laugh like me and I could anticipate your next sigh, I knew when you were unsure and you could hear all the words I chose not to say. A steady fire had ignited in us both.


“Oh, I think that I’ve found myself a cheerleader
She is always right there when I need her

She gives me love and affection
Baby, did I mention
You’re the only girl for me
No, I don’t need a next one
Mama loves you too
She thinks I made the right selection
Now all that’s left to do
Is just for me to …”

(Cheerleader -Omi)

Some people are beautiful, in looks, in what they say, and in what they are. You my lover are beautiful



Dear Morenike #LettersOfTheHeart

A hundred and five is the number that comes to my head when I think of all the years I wanna be with you”

That’s the songs that pops in my head whenever, wherever I set my eyes on you. I just wanna get on one knee and do it once and for all. The God-honest truth is I really dunno what I like/love about you. Maybe it’s the smile, your beauty, your sexy body; I really dunno. What exactly attracted me to you? All I know is I saw you once and I liked you. I tried to get you off my mind but I couldn’t, I was completely “love struck”. A couple of months later “bang bang bang”, you became ‘Mrs Black’ queen of my heart”.
I’ve being with a couple of girls in the short time I’ve spent in this life – good relationships in fact that I thought would lead to something great, but at the end of the day, they all left. Yours is the longest relationship I have ever been in and I definitely want more years with you.
We are always disagreeing, always making each other flare up and asking questions like “how did I even end up with you? but deep down we are sure that we are the best thing to ever happen to each other. And despite all the relationship “experiences” I’ve had; with you I’m a novice. You just make me wonder.
Baby I sure to God am hooked on you, you are my fix. I used to convince myself that I’m not the kinda guy to just “love up” and then make a lady “the beginning and the end” of my entire existence but that changed with you. You definitely make me wanna be a better person, always trying to bring out the best in me. Even if it means you have to sometimes be naughty/nasty about it.
You know I’m a man of many words always having something to say, but here I am finding it difficult to use my words appropriately to express the way I feel about you and how you make me feel. It took me three days to put this together and I still haven’t expressed myself the way I have it in my head. I honestly can’t explain how I feel or what exactly is the thing(s) I like/love about you. Baby you’re the best and “I LOVE YOU”
I started this by saying a hundred and five is number of years I wanna spend with you; we’ve just spent 2, 103 remaining which means I still have a lot of time to shower my love on you. I gave you the name “MORENIKE” for a reason. MORENIKE, ”MA DE KE E”. I know I’m very stupid and don’t always behave myself – that’s what love makes you do. So please baby bear with me.
Love you always.
Yours Truly,
Babatunde Oladapo Benjamin (DatBlacBoi).


Dear Daughters #LettersOfTheHeart

A(nother) letter to my Lovies
I know what you are thinking, I have written and spoken so much
“Father’s words’. Well, at my last check, it hasn’t killed you; quite
the contrary in fact; so again I write. One letter to three of you,
three letters to each of you-That you may learn lessons from and of
one another. Temi, Desola & Olaolu, I give you (yet again)…A Father’s
Having three daughters is the dream. I remember when I began to moot
the idea and a lot of friends thought it weird, which normal African
man doesn’t want sons? I was lucky. Your mother liked the idea so here
we are; in hindsight, I think it is a great one. But i cannot deny, i
had real fears, how was i going to be able to raise decent young women
in a world that was fast decaying; would I be able to shield them
against the virulent pervasion that was consuming the world; looking
at three of you, I know without a doubt that God’s hands was behind it
all; Incontrovertibly so.
Temiloluwa, you are a pride of a daughter, I can’t stop thanking God
for you. Truth be told, you kind of remind me of your big Uncle Vic.
He was reputed to be everyone’s delight too. The way you organize and
marshal everything, and those awards that you always receive from
school- they really should consider changing Best Student Award to The
Temiloluwa Award. I like David too, that young man you have an eye
for. He is a good chap but I fear that while expecting him to make a
move, you unwittingly push him away. You see, good guys like David are
rare. They combine a mixture of traits that serve advantages and
disadvantages. He is confident but conservative. He is focused and
kind-hearted but most importantly he is sensitive to what you say and
do. I agree with you that he really likes you but i don’t think he
doesn’t know what he wants. You see, the little things you say and
think do not have any meaning get into his mind and make a deposit.
Last week you said what you really wanted to focus on without
distractions was building your global women’s rights group. A man like
David hears that and thinks “maybe she is not ready”. Another time you
teased him about all those his girls- Don’t be surprised he’s thinking
“maybe she just wants to be friends and not be the girl”. I once had a
female friend like that-immediately after secondary school; I liked
her a bit and was considering asking her about a relationship. But she
kept on yapping on how she wasn’t a fan of distance relationships. For
a young man heading off to university, I took that as a hint
(THANKFULLY to be honest) and left that. Years later, I learnt she was
actually expecting me to say something and I didn’t. My point is,
don’t give mixed signals. Say what you mean and mean what you say. I
know you well enough to not bother counselling you to however, not
sell yourself cheap. And if what I see in David’s eyes is what i think
it is, He will wait. And you will have each other. Just don’t make
each other waste time.
Desola, My Iron Lady. Your intolerance for foolishness combined with
the kindness of your heart makes me admire you ALWAYS. You question
anything and everything. The only thing that makes that not scary for
me is that Jesus has captured your heart from the beginning. But you
have friends I have words for. You see in my days, young people
swooned over Hollywood movies. But they made a costly assumption; they
felt Hollywood was a window to the ‘civilised’ society. It was in some
ways, but in others it really wasn’t. Hollywood was the forefront of
moral decadence in the US but they thought it was a reflection of the
general society. So they westernized their morality after the
Hollywood fashion. So much so that chastity became a thing to be
“ashamed” about. Some even took it further to suggest in their
dimension of feminism that it was a ploy to suppress women considering
that men seemed to get away with it. Even the ‘good’ girls started
wanting ‘experienced’ men on their wedding night- I wonder where they
wanted them to receive the experience from. Let your voice continue
to be loud, firm in what you believe. The discipline in waiting brews
a control for staying. Just look around at the divorce rates; see how
much emanated from infidelity. Some from my days felt they had made mistakes and made decisions- decisions which I am happy to say turned out a beautiful life for them, some others felt it didn’t matter and I guess they are fine too. They say we are old fashioned; yes we
are. But that’s only because our reason is different from theirs. They
did it for culture; even religion. We do it for dedication to our
faith. With you, I am hardly fearful; you have made a life of standing
for what you believe is right, even when you stand against the whole
world.  Boss Lady, Your Father salutes you!
Olauluwa my baby! Growing up the child of public figures cannot be
easy and I know it. Being Temi and Desola’s sister probably doesn’t
help; for many this could be an unbearable pressure but not my baby!
You keep slaying left right and centre. I have a concern though. I
fear that you do what is ‘proper’. You do things you think we like. We actually do like them but My darling, you are too young to
make heavy sacrifices for your family. You remind me of a character in
a popular movie in my childhood- The Lion King. The princess got to a
point where she had to ask “If there is so much I must be, Can i still
just be me, the way I am? Can i trust in my own heart or am i just one
part of some big plan?” Well, Olaoluwapemi Farra Amina, daughter of Adekunle. I
tell you today, no plan of anyone- not mine, not your mother’s, not
your sisters can/should supersede your own personal plans. Spread your
wings Sugar, Fly and Soar. Do exactly what you want so far you have
considered it well and reckon it to be right. You can be assured that
in your daddy you will find a smile of love, a twinkle of approval and
a wink of affection.

It will be Valentine’s in a few days. I wrote this letter and planned
that you would read it just before your mother and I return from our
outing. We have news. The Lord has done it! Actually more like The
Lord-Featuring Your Mum and I. You are (finally) getting a baby
Love you all, Lovies. Really Really do.


Dear Me #LettersOfTheHeart

Hey ME!
Siting at my desk on this bright and cheerful day, I can’t but think about you
Funny, one might say. Laughable even! Because you are me twenty years from now.
But this I say, every word as precious as the glimpse of a comet on a starry night
I may have given birth to you but your shadow itself outshines me
I cannot fully comprehend your beauty, for it is far beyond the physical
It defies nature’s laws in that it has come with age, glowing fiercely as it mounts
It radiates with every person you give hope
With every smile that grows brighter because they have met you
Your selfless, kind and caring heart are your biggest traits and many have sought to share in the wisdom glimpsed from your passionately spoken words
You are a force to reckon with and I would have been foolish not to see it, prepare and nurture you
You amaze me with your strength of character and amuse me with you relentless humor
Integrity and honor are important to you and you teach also of the power in humility and diligence
You remind me very often of the different shades of grace and I am beyond grateful for the person you have become
Neither the scars of the past or the fear of the future have marred your delicate heart
Instead you have stood strong and tall in the face of adversity; you shunned it, knowing of a truth that what didn’t break you can only make you stronger
Your name is testimony and you are a giver of hope to your generation
I would certainly have loved to tell you that I was exclusively responsible for all you have become but I very well know the truth: you were carefully woven and spun by the I AM
He made you possible and put pillars to stand beside you as your husband, children, mentors and friends on this challenging yet very fulfilling journey
I love you genuinely and neither time nor event can dispute that

From a heart bursting at the seams with love and hope
Yours Always,
P.S. I expect you to surpass every dream and expectation I have of you


Dear One Who Wants To Stay #LettersOfTheHeart

Dear One-Who-Wants-to-Stay,
I thought I would not have much to say to you, but it turns out, I was wrong. It seems I don’t quite know as much as I think I do about us.
See, I thought I knew you, the kind of person you were, but you are nothing like I anticipated. A part of me is still being blind to that, but it’s true. You are not the pig-headed buffoon who tussles with me every day for control. You are not the manipulative, arrogant, ignorant bastard that I expected. You are not like him, you know, the One-Who-Had-to-Go.
I wake up every morning, mentally tying my wrapper and adjusting my blouse ready to pounce at the slightest provocation, but you come waving a white flag and bearing the warmest hugs. Your eyes, they disarm me, and your smile, it tells me to lay down my arms, because there is no need or room for war. You don’t fight me, even when I’m spoiling for it. You love me with every breath you take, and everything you do. And this is not something you had to tell me; your actions and very being speak louder than a thousand words. You loved me until I put down my weapons and took down every piece of brick in my wall with my own hands.
I panic sometimes. I am afraid. I keep thinking I will wake up and that old monster will reappear before me. Other times, I think maybe you’re too good to be true, you couldn’t possibly be true. I lash out and try you, but you stay. Patient through my tantrums and anxiety attacks. Leaving me be or holding me close till I can breathe again.
I am a whole new person on account of you. I am better in ways I didn’t think possible, because of you. Your love is healing all my damage and putting together my broken pieces. And I know I sit and act like all that you bear for me is my birthright, but it’s not. They’re not.
So this is my thank you. For every hurdle you’ve jumped, every tear you’ve wiped, and every prayer you’ve said. You continue to exceed expectations I did not even know I had. Others respect me more because of you. You are a dream, even though you were not obvious from the start. You’re the “best thing I never knew I needed.”
And now, I think I have done enough “what-ifing”, and wondering, and cowering behind fear and hurt. I have let damage rule long enough.
Dear One-Who-Wants-to-Stay, it is such an honor to be cared for, to be looked at the way you look at me, and I apologise for all the times I took it for granted. It’s time to return the honor, to give you back love the way you’ve given me. I could make you promises of earth-moving and mountain climbing love but I won’t. I’ll just take one day at a time, trying to mirror your actions. I will tell you this though, you will no longer be the One-Who-Wants-to-Stay. You are now, simply, The One.
Please, stay with me.