Depression #ItChangedMyLife

By Eunice Kuranga

Four years ago, everything seemed to be going on fine with me. It was as if the world was at my fingertip. I went to the best school, I knew no trouble, I was care free and I was not bothered by any life challenges.
I was in SS3 and the excitement of been a finalist was there, I had a wonderful friend and we both agreed to come out with the best result in our WAEC, have good grades in UTME and go to the same university even  though we would be studying different courses.
But all this became nothing but empty and fruitless dreams especially for me. I did the UTME, I had less than 200. My admission into the university for that year was forfeited. I got a lot of encouragement from my friend and family members and I was fine.
I wrote WAEC and I had excellent results. My friend proceeded to the university and I assured her I would join her the following year.
I studied hard for UTME the following year and guess what, I had more than 200. Hurray! I did the Post UTME for my chosen university and I had an excellent result, but you know what, I wasn’t given an admission. My parents tried all they could by contacting everyone they knew but it was all in vain.
I became the opposite of myself. I didn’t take the rejection kindly. I was depressed because I expected more than life was offering me. I was longing, hurting, wanting, clinging, crying and my sanity was ebbing away. I preferred to be alone. People complained, my parent were disappointed and sad but I was helpless.
While surfing the net one day, I stumbled on a blog – lordjosh.wordpress.com. I started reading his novels and stories, I also came across other writers and I read their stuffs.
My orientation about life changed. My dry bones came alive again and I was revived, I wanted nothing more than to be useful for my generation.
I then discovered I have a special pen which can affect lives positively. Would I say Lordjosh changed my life? A big NO. But my depression made me seek out joy. It made me find my purpose in life. I made use of my pain. Like someone said; “When life throws onions at you , use it to make pepper soup and when it throws knife at you, use it to chop your onions.”
Realize that no one is your enemy, except yourself, any human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight.
Depression taught me to take life one step at a time, love myself for whom I am and be better, so now I’m growing stronger every day.
Depression, it changed my life.

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