I Saw You Kissing #ItChangedMyLife

By Stephany.

It was a cold night, I wore thick sweaters with jeans to brace myself from the cold, but I still hadn’t braced myself enough for what I was about to witness. I wasn’t prepared for it, I couldn’t have been in a million years. I saw you kissing someone. It wasn’t that my young self hadn’t seen anyone do that before, no, we see that in the movies all the time, I was stunned because you were kissing someone of the same sex! I was shocked, confused, disgusted, disappointed. I kept staring for a while, I just couldn’t comprehend what I was seeing. You didn’t realize I saw you that night and I wasn’t going to tell you either. I just made up my mind to cut all ties with you. I couldn’t have someone committing such abominable act in my life. I needed sanity and direction in life, not people doing ‘strange’ things. I started to ignore you and keep my distance and our friendship deteriorated. Slowly, you finally realized what I knew and tried to make amends. But I wasn’t having any of that. I was too holy to behold your iniquity but somehow, you kept reappearing in my life. It was as if God kept aligning our paths. You kept apologising for that night and told me your struggles and how you really didn’t want to be that person. I didn’t know if I could stand you so I still kept away. But yet in all your struggles you strangely kept confiding in me. We then decided to work on this habit and started having bible study together and praying together and doing stuff together. Till date, those moments are still one of the best moments of my life. I saw you grow and become a way better person, who still struggled…but prevailed anyway. I saw you start to lead bible study in church and become the person other youths looked up to. I saw you becoming my spiritual compass and prayer partner. Someone who brought me right back to God when I slipped.  I saw you become the real person that God made you to be. Sometimes I look back and wonder if that night ever happened or if it was just my imagination. Meeting you made me realize that people fall, it’s not about not falling but it’s about rising up after the fall. It made me realize that being gay isn’t a biological attribute or inherent in a person but a choice and God can help whoever seeks to be helped. It helped me realize that casting people who have derailed and acting like you are better than them isn’t what God has called us to do but rather being a friend indeed and providing a shoulder to lean on. I wouldn’t lie and say you became a better person in a day, no, it took time but I’m happy you finally got here. Even though you have family to attend to now and we are not as close as we were many, many years ago but still, I would always be grateful to God that I met you and that God used me to make you a  better person and vice versa. Meeting you made a great part of who I am today. Meeting you changed my life.  *A note to everyone struggling with bad habits….myself included. Please do remember that a problem shared is a problem half solved, get a confidant and talk it through, pray together. Having that friend may just change your life for good! 🙂

36 thoughts on “I Saw You Kissing #ItChangedMyLife

  1. Awwwwn…This is one kind of a story!…And the fact that you were also human too (you had your own doubts before taking him in) Nothing more graceful than staying with people even in their mess. God bless you for sharing this ma’am!

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