By Jesutoroti Balogun
Everyone has stories to tell as regards life changing experiences and I am not an exemption. I have loved, I have been heart broken, I have trusted, I have been betrayed and of course I have lost some loved ones. These experiences changed a part of me but the sudden loss of my Dad hasn’t left my entire life the same way, it’s had an immense impact on it. I have consoled a few of my friends that have at one time or the other lost a close person by saying ‘I know how you feel’… Well, it usually was about consolation as I also felt their pain but honestly, I never had an idea of what it really feels like to lose someone who means the world to you. Or would I say no one has experienced the intensity of that pain I feel whenever I remember my Dad because it’s just so unexplainable. When I hear people say words like ‘I know how it feels…’, ‘I feel your pain…’ bla bla bla. I shake my head because I know they do not have the slightest idea and I really do not wish they do at least not so early. It is usually a very unpalatable life changing experience.
Talking about change, losing someone so close to the heart as my Dad was to mine, leaves you with a definite change that can be positive or negative. As for me, I deliberately made efforts to imbibe the positive transformation that being fatherless brought to my path. Although, I initially questioned God, I felt empty and naked, I felt a part of me was gone, I felt I was a living corpse. Infact, I dwelt on the negativities and I was beginning to act like that fool who said God wasn’t in existence… I’m sure you can relate. Not too long after, I had better understanding on THE BREVITY OF LIFE, THE VANITY OF LIFE, MY PURPOSE IN LIFE AND MY HOME AT THE END OF LIFE.
Of a truth, of all my experiences in life (and the ones to come), losing my Dad to death was one that changed my life completely.